Hilarious Twitter thread reveals what Olympics would be like with amateurs

Credit: Laura Lexx

Hilarious Twitter thread reveals what Olympics would be like with amateurs

The f**ken Olympics is pretty much the pinnacle of modern sport. Deadset, for about a month, we all pretend we give a s**t about every obscure bloody sport on the planet as we enjoy watching superhuman athletes dominate the field. Yeah, nah, it’s pretty bloody special, but if you have nothing to compare the impressive performances against – or haven’t seen them in real life – you might not understand just how bloody good the athletes are. Comedian Laura Lexx reckons she has the solution…

Yeah, nah, we’ve gotta be honest, the solution she puts forward hadn’t occurred to us, but now that we’re mulling it over, we reckon it could be a goer. Basically, she reckons that to let us see just how good the athletes are, we should have average blokes and blokettes compete before the pros step up to the plate.

“Before each event I think there should just be a normal person having a go,” she reckons, “(just) to show you the scale of how phenomenal the Olympians are.”

And yeah, it’s deadset not a bad idea. Like, when you consider the world record for the long jump is nearly nine f**ken metres, it doesn’t mean much until you watch your mate Barry try to jump over a puddle when he’s getting out of the car.

The same thing should stand for the Olympics. As Lexx says, “Imagine being the member of the public who just gets handed a horse and someone says “this is Twinkle: make her dance like a sexy crab on ants.”

Yeah, nah, that s**t sounds tricky, but until you’ve seen people f**k it up, you just don’t know how difficult it is. That’s why we’re all for this. We reckon it’d give us a new appreciation of the athletes while we’re drinking beer and watching them from the comfort of the couch.

Final thought: Yeah, nah, deadset, this is mintox. Anyway, if you’ve had a crack at any of the Olympic events and f**ked up miserably, share your story. We’re keen to hear it.

Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Old Gymnastics