Willem Dafoe once used a stunt penis because his was “too big”

We don’t know about you, but we’ve often wondered how much on-screen Hollywood nudity is real. Don’t get us wrong, we know that a lot of times normal bodies are just…normal bodies, but sometimes you’ve gotta wonder if prosthetics or stunt doubles are used, right? Well, it turns out they are. Particularly if you’re Willem Dafoe and your schlong is so big everyone on set is confused by it.

Before we go on, that’s gotta explain why the dude’s always grinning. On one hand, he’s just a kinda creepy-looking dude who happens to be a f**ken amazing actor. On the other, he’s packing a sour cream rifle that’s akin to one of Cthulhu’s insanity-inducing tentacles.

in the antichrist commentary von Trier mentions that willem dafoe’s dick was too big for the sex scenes so they had to use a stunt penis in his place. good for him, if anyone deserves a confusingly large dick it’s dafoe

— 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 (@becchae) February 9, 2020

If you’ve seen Antichrist, Lars von Trier’s 2009 psychological horror, you’ll know that Dafoe had to get his kit off. Apparently, though, when they were filming, the star of The Lighthouse, Spider-Man, Platoon and er…Speed 2, let his castmates in on a mindboggling secret.

Been a while since I tweeted this so fun fact Willem Dafoe's schmeat is so big that when he was filming an unsimulated sex scene in a Lars Von Trier movie, Dafoe had to have a penis stunt double because LVT thought that no one would believe his humongous penis was real

— Chef Gnario 'Soup' Papi (@nicksays_summer) January 31, 2021

According to von Trier, “He [Dafoe] has an enormous d**k. We had to take those scenes out of the film. We had a stand-in for him because we had to take the scenes out with his own d**k.”

He went on to say, “We had to [have a stand-in d**k], because Will’s was too big,” and, “everybody got very confused when they saw it.”

Learning about Willem Dafoe needing a penis stunt double cause a director was too distracted by his giant horse was not on my 2022 bingo card.

— Xenader (@Xenader) July 19, 2022

As for Dafoe’s comments on the matter, he was quizzed about having ‘Hollywood’s biggest trouser snake’ in 2013 when The Guardian scribe Stuart Jeffries asked if it was true. Dafoe chose not to confirm or deny, saying only, “I don’t really work in Hollywood anymore.”

We can’t confirm or deny for you, but we have answered our original question: sometimes actors do have stand ins, especially when the audience needs to be saved from the sight of a mind-blowingly large womb broom.

Movie Trivia – Did you know that in the final scene of the 1997 Paul Thomas Anderson film “Boogie Nights”, when Dirk Diggler (played by Mark Wahlberg) finally reveals his prodigious penis, it’s actually the stunt penis of actor Willem Dafoe. pic.twitter.com/REgzTOUpde

— Fake Js Communist (@FakeJsCommunist) July 10, 2021

Final thought: Yeah, look, we’re just gonna say that if you want to confirm this, you can probably Google it, but that’s totally your call. If you do, though, let us know whether or not Dafoe’s wanger is as impressive as this story makes it sound.

Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Tree Lopping Fails #2

H/T: LADBIBLE.