This little sheila has trained her bird to attack on f***en command

Here at Ozzy Man Reviews, we’re pretty firm believers in the idea that animal attack videos are the f**ken height of comedy. Deadset, we love it. F**ken gecko grabbing someone by the goolies? Comedy gold! F**ken cassowary kicking someone in the cloaca? Brilliant! F**ken bull blasting someone into a brick wall? Whack some Benny Hill music over that s**t and let the carnage begin! With that in mind, imagine the fun you could have if you could train a bird to attack on command.

My niece has her bird trained to attack anyone she screams at 😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/ea0JoWMNrT

— Lord Flocko 🐦 (@Apex_sH) April 30, 2019

Seriously, check out this little sheila and her mutant power. Yeah, nah, she doesn’t need a bloody well-trained guard dog. She’s got a parrot that will f**k your s**t up. Just recently, the internet witnessed a video of her skills online.

Credit: Lord Flocko

It plays out like the found footage super-villain origin of an X-Men bad guy, and it’s only short, but the sheer terror it must pose for those of you with ornithophobia is pretty impressive.

When the video plays, the bird – a really quite colourful little parrot – sits menacingly on the bed frame while the little sheila grins like a happy drunkard. Next thing, she witnesses someone approach, and like a ghost from James Wan’s Conjuring Universe, she turns, sprints forward and screams her arse off.

Credit: Lord Flocko

What’s really impressive, though, is the f**ken parrot. It’s like there’s a telepathic link there. It’s a f**ken projectile. No s**t, the kid may as well be firing arrows made of screeching, squawking bundles of razor-sharp beaks and talons.

Credit: Lord Flocko

There’s another accompanying scream and the video comes to an abrupt end. All we can assume is that Mum – or whoever the victim was – is dead now. That little chick is now left to conquer the free world with her evil little sidekick and her terrifying power.

F**k that.

Credit: Lord Flocko

Final thought: We don’t know about you guys, but we reckon the government needs to find this little lass and harness her powers. After all, if they don’t, someone else will. And we’ve all seen that movie!

In the spirit of animal attacks, here’s one of Ozzy’s classic commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: People f**ked up by bulls!

Video Link: Lord Flocko

H/T: BORED PANDA.