Nurse escapes prison-sentence after treating patient’s “Tuna Taco” as a puppet

Credit: Pixabay/Liveauctioneers

Nurse escapes prison-sentence after treating patient’s “Tuna Taco” as a puppet

You know, if we were sitting around the Ozzy Man Reviews newsroom and coming up with headlines for you blokes and blokettes, this is exactly the sort of thing we’d consider before going, ‘Yeah, nah, no one’s gonna believe that!’ But, here we are, and yeah, we’re pretty sure it’s a real story with quotes and names and everything. S**t, even if it’s not, we’re treating it like one.

So, yeah, what we’ve got here in Cwmgelli Lodge Care Home in Blackwood South Wales is a bloody mental story that has got to be right up there as one of the most what-the-actual-f**k stories we’ve come across. Before we go on, though, if any of our Welsh friends could tell us how to pronounce Cwmgelli, that’d be bloody grouse.

Credit: Cwmgelli Lodge

Anyway, William Kennedy, a 58-year-old nurse at the hospice for disabled people – which really makes this worse – was examining a patient when he remembered the funniest part of Ace Ventura and realised he had the perfect opportunity to one-up the butt-talk.

The crazy b**tard reportedly ‘pulled the patient’s labia apart’ looked at his colleagues and said, “Hello, my name is…(whatever the patient’s understandably protected name is).” As you can imagine, he was charged with Ill-treating a patient who ‘lacked mental capacity’.

Credit: Pixabay

Unbelievably, bloody Kennedy reckons the whole thing’s been blown out of proportion. While he’s escaped jail-time, he’s in deep s**t at work and is under monitoring and unable to conduct ‘intimate’ examinations. A panel for the Nursing and Midwifery Council said he spent his interrogation, “Justifying and minimising the offence…describing it as having been blown out of proportion, relying on the absence of sexual motivation and his own sexual orientation.”

Credit: Liveauctioneers

Final thought: Look, this whole thing is actually pretty bloody horrific, but can you imagine the faces of the other nurses in that room? You wouldn’t know what to do, would you? You’ve got a supposed professional inappropriately touching the genitals of a presumably disabled person and using them like a ventriloquist’s doll. What would you do?

Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: When Animals Fight back #6