This Chinese fish has got people freaking out
In popular culture, there’s a strange notion that any sort of half-fish/half-human hybrid is gonna be a kind of aesthetically pleasing creature to look at. Clearly, that’s bulls**t and Disney has a lot to answer for. What’s not bulls**t, though, is the fact that a fish with a human head has just been found in China. No s**t. Yeah, nah, yeah, they deadset have footage of it and everything. Check it out…
As you’ll see from the video we’ve got here for you, the ugly little bugger – a carp – is chilling out in a pond and just doing his thing. Don’t get us wrong. It’s not exactly a Fiji mermaid, but it’s not exactly got a ‘human head’ either. Yeah, obviously, right? What we will say, however, is that those markings are actually pretty f**ken grouse. Have a squiz at this little bewdy.
He was found in the Miao village pond in Kunming in China. Apparently, the sheila who found him was amazed at how human-like his head was – and we’ll be honest – it’s actually pretty disconcerting at first glance. If you saw it in the wild, you’d be forgiven for thinking you’d found your way to Dutchman’s Creek from John Langan’s bloody excellent book, The Fisherman.
So, yeah, the sheila filming actually thought the fish had turned into a fairy. Or so we’re told. And, if we’re super generous, we might give that one an “OK, love.” In fairness, we kinda get it, but a fairy? That’s a bit rich, we reckon.
Anyway, from the top down, you can see that his big googly fish eyes are still there on the side of his head and the markings just create a pattern that gives your pareidolia a raging hard-on. If you don’t know what that is, it’s a boner. Yeah, a hard-on’s a boner. If you got that one but you weren’t sure about pareidolia, that’s when you recognise human faces in everyday objects. Like Jesus in toast.
Final thought: Look, we’re just spit-balling here and we reckon it’s all because of paradolia and the nature of the carp’s markings, but you never know. It could be a warning from the fish-gods that we need to do something about the state of the oceans and overfishing. Probably not, though. Yeah, nah, probably not.
Just in case you missed it, here’s one of Ozzy’s latest commentary videos…Ozzy Man Reviews: Animals Relaxing
Video Link: Viral Strong
H/T: DAILY MAIL.