Chuck Steinway

Chuck, not his real name, is a Brisbane writer and teacher. He writes radio commercials, feature articles, short stories and longer-form fiction. You can read his fiction in Dark Moon Digest 32/33 from Perpetual Motion Machine Publishing. It's got crocodiles! http://perpetualpublishing.com/product/dark-moon-digest-issue-32-33/

These water-activated street murals come alive when it rains

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Unless you’re a farmer out in the big dry, you can usually be forgiven for thinking that rain is actually a bit crap. If you’re a sheila, it makes your hair go frizzier than a freshly shampooed muff, and if you’re a b...

A sheila chugged an entire bottle of Cognac rather than hand it to airport security

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If you’ve ever been through an airport, you’ll be aware that customs people are some of the most joyless, miserable and hard-to-please blokes and blokettes on the planet. It doesn’t matter where you are, there’s just ...

Plane passenger opens emergency exit door thinking it was the toilet

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Even at the best of times, flying is about as enjoyable as getting swarmed by a bloody deluge of mozzies. The seats are squishy, the food is terrible and every now and then, some flamin’ galah opens the emergency exit...

MIke Tyson is building a 407-acre weed holiday resort

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If you’re the kind of bloke who loves to chill out to the sound of a bubbling bong, you might be pretty keen on seeing exactly what boxing legend and weed aficionado Mike Tyson has been cooking up for his next-flamin-...

You can now share a brewski with your good boi thanks to these non-alcoholic beers

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Mate, if there’s one thing we love to share with the boys here at Ozzy Man Reviews, it’s a couple of cold brewskis. There really is nothing better than chilling out with your mates, knocking some cold ones on the head...

Cat fitted with four bionic paws after losing limbs to frostbite

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We’ve all heard the saying ‘cats always land on their feet,’ right? Well, while that always turns out to be true when you throw the neighbour’s annoying cat back over the fence, it’s also true on a deeper and cheesier...

Justin Bieber has challenged Tom Cruise to a fight in the octagon

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Don’t ever let anyone tell you the world is not a crazy place. Deadset. We’re looking at this story and we’re shaking our heads and we’re wondering just what mind-bending lunacy the gods of Hollywood social media will...

Sheila posts CCTV video showing ‘Dobby’ looking creature in her driveway

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Most people who are familiar with the Harry Potter movies know exactly who Dobby is. If you have no inclination to watch Harry Potter, he’s that little elf thing that looks way more like a goblin than an elf. Anyway, ...

Dad kicked out of the delivery room by nurse for making rude jokes

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Back in the day, or so it seems, no bloke worth his salt was ever seen in the delivery room when the missus was squeezing out a fresh cherub. They just sat outside the door, slowly getting sloshed and preparing their ...

Honest illustrations depict what really happens in long term relationships

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Anyone who’s either in a long-term relationship or has experienced one knows that it’s not quite the same as dating in the early days. While that s**t’s all about making sure you iron your shirts, pluck your ear-hairs...

Police surround house for burglary and find more than they were hunting for

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F**ken dear oh dear, this is one of those situations where s**t could have gotten out of control really f**ken quickly. Deadset, when the local cops rocked up to this suspected burglary, they sure as s**t weren’t expe...

Illustrator hilariously imagines how Godzilla was able to stand in the ocean

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Here in Ozzyland, we’re pretty proud that some blokes – and even a few sheilas – reckon we’re the official land of the reptile. And, yeah, while we reckon we may have some competition, we’re happy to claim it. But, an...

This guy heard a lady call him fat so bought out the entire store so she missed out

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No matter where you’re at in your own life, there’s not really any reason that justifies being a c**t about it in public. It’s something that just makes other people feel s**t, and in fairness, we never know what diff...

The motives behind television’s most notorious hack remains a mystery 30 years later

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Those of you who are into your conspiracy theories and s**t will know exactly what the Max Headroom television hack was. Those of who you aren’t familiar with this iconic moment in television history are about to beco...

Footage of Japanese chef reveals what the inside of a giant squid looks like

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We’ve talked about octopuses a few times here on Ozzy Man Reviews, but we’ve never really given much love to their cousins, the squid. And that’s not really fair. We f**ken love calamari, and when we recently came acr...